How Not to Use the Slow Cooker

This is not some kind of bizarre bouquet; it is actually a handful of hard-as-a-rock pasta. I thought I simplest tomato sauce."

might try to avoid dirtying another pot by emptying a pound of uncooked penne into the slow cooker after making Marcella Hazan's three-ingredient "

A previous attempt at pasta fagioli with elbow macaroni had been moderately successful, so I thought the trick might work again. I wish I had read this thread, which explains why uncooked pasta is not the best food to dump into the slow cooker.

There is a very famous book called Modernist Cuisine, which was reviewed in the New York Times about a year ago. The book talks about all of the scientific processes involved in creating "molecular gastronomic" food (the term has since fallen out of favor). Do you think a scientist could work with me on a volume about all of my disasters?