Even the Candle Broke...

Today is my poor husband's birthday. I know he was wondering why I was so preoccupied; I was frantically running around trying to create this disaster without him noticing my efforts. My technique? I started out with a flourless chocolate cake recipe from Italian Slow Cooker. (I forgot to post that I recently purchased a slow cooker, which I hoped would alleviate some of my more egregious cooking errors.) The recipe called for bittersweet chocolate, sugar, coffee, eggs, and butter.

I should mention that my disposable aluminum cake pan was too wide for the oval slow cooker, so I had to kind of smoosh it into the cooker insert. I set the cooker on HIGH, and waited for the results with bated breath.

After over an hour of baking, the cake showed no indication of progressing beyond a liquid consistency. So, I stuck the cake in the oven. A knife never came out clean, although I read that this might be a common occurrence with flourless chocolate cakes. I simply had no idea when I should take the cake out. One baking blog said that this kind of cake should not stay in the oven for more than 35 minutes. Panicking, I took the cake out.

Drama: the moment of unmolding was at hand. This step, I should've skipped. I turned the cake out onto the plate, and a big chunk of the middle immediately stuck to the pan. Whatever aesthetic potential this unfortunate cake may have had was greatly reduced.

The final step of the recipe was a dusting of cocoa - not having the right sort of gadget, I emptied a teaspoon of cocoa over a strainer that I drain spaghetti through. Unevenly, I tried to camouflage the valley in the middle of the cake.

(By the way, the cake was originally round, I swear. The uneven right edge is due to the fact that my husband - inexplicably - tasted the cake.)